Notes from the World’s End # 1 (Out Hunting for Dialogue)

Published on November 18 2013

Setting: Seven-thirty in the evening in the café/bar in the village of Auvers-le-Hamon, France: population 1,500

The café owner, a tall, thin man is leaning on the shelves behind the bar, his arms crossed. One customer, a reddish man with a long shaggy moustache, is seated at the bar. I’m also sitting at the bar, reading the local newspaper (what they call here “the journal of squashed cats.”)

Shaggy moustache: (looking out the front window) Pfffhewww.[1] Cold out there.

Bar owner: Sure is.

Shaggy moustache: Much colder than yesterday.

Bar owner: Much.

Door opens. In comes a youngish, clean-shaven man with dark hair. He sits at the bar, orders a beer.

Youngish man: Phew. Cold out there. W-pp-hhhh. (bats hands)

Bar owner: Wophhhpf. Sure is.

Youngish man: Colder than last night.

Café owner and Shaggy moustache together: Woophffff. Certainly is.

Door opens. In comes another youngish man who also sits at the bar and orders a pastis.

Second youngish man: Fhoo! (slaps upper arms) Cold out there.

First youngish man: Hoohfff! Certainly is!

Café owner: Colder than last night.

First youngish man: You can say that again!

Second youngish man: Pwfff. Much colder!

Shaggy moustache: Wffofff.

Short silence

Shaggy moustache: They say it’ll be even colder tomorrow.

First youngish man: Heard that too.

Second youngish man: Fufffff.

Me: I don’t know if anyone’s noticed this, but we are in mid-November.

Very long silence

Second youngish man: (slowly) She’s right, you know.

Bar owner: (equally slowly) Yes. She is.

Very long silence.

First youngish man: But still…

Shaggy moustache: Yes, but still… pwfff. Cold out there.

The End

[1] There’s a considerable amount of onomatopoeia in French bar conversations. I’ve reproduced the sounds as closely as possible.

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ouaives 01/19/2014 13:18

Pfffhewww! Cold out there

Fans Blog 11/21/2013 02:33

I like.

Brenna Chase 11/18/2013 19:11

LOL Not a lot of inspiration for dialogue there! But some interesting characters, no doubt. :)